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Mission Accomplished! One year in China
25 August 2008
The Old Codger
has now been in China for a full year. The time went
by quickly, despite the occasional bouts with boredom due to
an extremely relaxed work schedule and environment.
Fortunately, recently released movies can be purchased on
DVDs for about USD $1.00. Of course, they aren't
counterfeit. They all have the FBI warning about it
being illegal to make illegal copies of movies and other
copyrighted materials.
The Old Codger
has heard that school starts again on September 1st.
The validity of that has yet to be confirmed.
Traditionally, foreigners are only advised of important
things a maximum of 2 days before something is to happen.
Alternatively, a notice will be posted for all the
foreigners in a common area, with all of the information
written in Chinese.
Over the
summer, some of the shops on campus have undergone
renovations, and workmen are now feverishly trying to
complete the work before the students officially arrive.
It is doubtful that even they know when the students are to
officially arrive. Somehow, and someway, it will be as
though a magic wand has been waived, and everything will
miraculously be completed. Whether the quality of the
finished job will meet expectations is of course, an
entirely separate issue. The "magic wand" phenomenon
is expected most any day now as students are beginning to
trickle back to campus, none of them looking exceptionally
happy.
The Old
Codger's transition to China was no doubt made easier
because of his knowledge of Asian culture in general
combined with having no pre-conceived notions about China.
Preconceived notions, The Old Codger has discovered over the
years, can evolve into disastrous situations. This
would be particularly true in China if one has gleaned their
preconceived notions from the western media which portrays
China in a very poor light, to say the least.
So, what has
The Old Codger learned or discovered over the past year in
China?
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The vast
majority of the world knows absolutely nothing, or at
best, very little about Chinese customs and traditions,
yet feels comfortable telling China that it needs to
change.
This could be a rather lengthy dissertation, so The Old
Codger will leave it with just this statement, and no
further comments. For more rants on this subject,
check The Old Codger's Blog.
-
The
Chinese are extremely friendly, and will go to great
lengths to help others, including, or perhaps even
especially, foreigners, and expect nothing in return.
-
Shopping
and don't quite know what to buy? Look confused
and someone - male or female - store employee or just
another shopper - will quickly come to your rescue and
tell you what to buy. Accept their recommendation.
It usually is the best product. The Old Codger
recently had a boy of about 10 years of age follow him
around a local store pointing out the best things to
buy. His recommendations were quite "spot" on.
-
If
something breaks or needs repairing, do not ever expect
it to be fixed right the first time, or even the fifth
time. For some reason, the Chinese do not seem to
understand the concept of finding out why something
stopped working. They simply get it working again,
and smile, and say "finish."
-
A
foreigner should never leave a computer unattended or
closely supervised around a Chinese person. A
computer is seemingly a communal item, and everyone
wants to "share" their favorite web site, and hence,
computer viruses with your computer.
-
Chinese
are seemingly quite self absorbed. There is
nothing wrong with stopping in the middle of a walk way
or bike lane, or even a street to talk to someone on
their cell phone.
-
Chinese
are very non-confrontational. They know that other
Chinese are also non-confrontational. Hence, it is
perfectly permissible, such as when driving, to make a
left hand turn from the far right side of the road.
They know that no one is going to challenge them because
it is everyone's responsibility to try to anticipate
what someone in front of them will do, no matter how
illogical their doing it may be.
-
Four out
of five traffic signal lights are installed for
decorative purposes only. Of the remaining one out
of five signal lights, if there is not a traffic camera
installed, a police man standing in the intersection, or
if it is after dark, that traffic light may also be
considered a decorative street enhancement and may be
ignored.
-
A police
car with its roof top lights flashing behind you, or
coming towards you may be ignored with impunity.
-
An
ambulance with its lights flashing may also be ignored
with general impunity unless it is sounding its siren.
In that case, you may continue driving, and the
ambulance will pass you when it gets a chance.
-
No Chinese
person riding a bicycle or an electric bike is capable
of driving or riding their bike in a straight line at
any time.
-
At an
intersection, if you have a push / pedal bike, you
should walk it across the intersection before mounting
again. If the police are not watching, ignore this
requirement and zig zag your way through the
intersection in accordance with the statement above.
-
If a
policeman hollers at you to stop, it is safe to ignore
him. He does not have a gun or a radio and you can
easily outrun him.
-
Never
express a wish to a Chinese person. They will
quite often try to make that wish come true. A
friend recently asked a Chinese person if they knew
where he might be able to find a cat. The next
day, two cats were delivered to him with the option to
take one or both. A trip to a pet store was also
organized so that cat food could be bought. The
cat didn't work out, and was soon returned to the
benefactor.
-
Get used
to the idea that adult Chinese people will invite you to
come to their house to "play." Some will even ask
you if they can come to your house to "play." Its
a language thing. Nothing more.
-
If you are
a man, and are offered a cigarette when you first meet
someone, take it and smoke it. It's equivalent in
the western world is shaking hands. If you smoke,
make sure you reciprocate. It is also appropriate
to take a pack of expensive cigarettes as a gift when
visiting someone's home.
-
If invited
to go to dinner, expect more food than you have ever
seen. You may also receive a gift from the host,
as you have honored him or her by accepting their
invitation.
-
If invited
to dinner, don't expect to be able to pick and chose
from the menu. It will have already been
pre-decided, and everyone will eat from the same bowls.
Learn how to master the use of chop sticks.
-
Dinner is
a social event in China. It will last an average
of three hours. Westerners go to a bar to
socialize. Chinese go to a restaurant to
socialize.
-
If offered
something to eat that is unfamiliar, if the person
offering it cannot tell you what it is in English, you
probably don't want to try it.
-
Don't
discuss politics or world events. The Chinese
typically don't like to discuss these things.
-
In a
business setting, the Chinese do not like to give money
to a foreigner. They want to "try it out" for free for
as long as possible to decide if they really want or
need what you are selling. They of course, do expect the
foreigner to buy from them quickly, but will negotiate
the price a bit.
-
When being
invited to "attend" some event in China - be it a party,
a meeting, or anything else, anything between two and
four hours advance notice is considered to be
appropriate, and all that is necessary.
-
Being
promised something "next week" means that you will have
it in two to three weeks.
-
He who
hesitates is lost. If you seen an opening, be it
in traffic or in a line or anyplace, take it quick.
Western courtesies simply do not exist.
-
Western
style table manners do not exist in China. When
eating something like chicken for example, it is not
proper to put the bone on your plate when finished.
Put it on the table or discretely drop it on the floor.
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When
speaking English to a Chinese person that understands
some English, remember that only about 35% of what you way
will be understood. 20% of what was understood
will be forgotten in the next three to five minutes.
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Always
carry some toilet paper or napkins with you. This
is especially true if you have eaten something that does
not have an English name. A public toilet with
toilet paper in China is a "luxury accommodation."
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Chinese
will complain about something, but not about a person.
For example, they would complain about
PD Dave's classes but not
him as a person or a teacher. They would all find
something good to say about him, and actually defend him as
a person or an individual. It is all part of Chinese
culture.
-
When
buying something - always buy the most expensive one
that you can find. It will always be better
quality.
-
When you
find something that you like in the grocery store, go
back and buy as much of it as you can. Odds are
that once it is sold out, you will never be able to find
it again.
-
If
something is on sale, odds are good that there is
something wrong with it.
-
When you
go to a shop or an office, always remember that the
Instant Messages that are popping up on someone's
computer screen are going to be much more important than
your business and they must be answered at any
cost.
-
Be
prepared to pay for some things in advance - before they
are delivered or the service is rendered to you.
Makes no difference if you are Chinese or foreign.
-
If the
sign says "Fifth Chinese People's Hospital" don't worry.
The quality of service and care is the same as at the
"First Chinese People's Hospital."
-
Don't ever
compare anything in China to Japan. Just like the
Civil War in the United States, that war is not
completely over yet.
-
Playing
table tennis (ping pong) with a one armed, one legged
Chinese person will be a humiliating experience
for you. You won't fare much better in a game of
badminton either.
-
If you
want to teach a Chinese person a new or different way to
do something, they will be more than happy to watch you
do the job your way. They will then go and do the
job or task their way, no matter how long it takes.
-
Tomorrow
is always preferable to today. Next week is also
acceptable.
-
Thee is no
such thing as a "meal for one" in a Chinese restaurant.
Whatever you order, will be enough for two to three
people.
-
For food
to be "authentic Chinese" it must be either fish or
cooked in at least 15% by volume cooking oil and be
floating in the oil when served.
-
Even if a
Chinese person knows you don't speak Chinese, they will
talk to you endlessly in Chinese. They will also
repeat whatever they told you at least twice just to
make sure that you understand that you didn't understand
a word that was said.
-
Chinese
think that all foreigners are rich.
-
A Chinese
person always want to buy you dinner - or lunch.
-
Chinese
people like Americans. They do not like George
Bush. McCain or Obama probably won't win many
friends either.
-
Things
that concern other people about China do not concern the
Chinese people at all.
-
The way to
a Chinese girls heart is to buy her a telephone. A
girl without at least two telephones may very possibly
have some sort of personality problem and probably
should be avoided.
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Click to
Enlarge |
Chinese Fashion Statement
if you try and avoid fashion you are playing
the "I ll act as if fashion isn't important to
me" fame. fashion is a natural force. it
has nothing to do with beaty. fashion
fulfills our fantasies and enriches our lives,
satisfies our psychol. ogical needs peppers
Found on a tag on
a pair of shorts. |
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All this here
this time around is certainly things you would never see or
learn about on the Discovery or Travel Channel. To
really learn about, understand or even discover China, you
have to live here for awhile. It truly can be
an enlightening and rewarding experience. All it takes
is an open mind, a whole lot of patience and a love for
life.
That's about
it for this time around. Not much other news that is
fit to print.
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